Bridging the Gap Between Us

Since I was born, I've never had to worry about any major circumstances. My family always had a house to live in, food on our table, clean water to drink, and nice clothes to wear. Even in times such as The Great Recession (2008), I never felt the need to worry about money.

In contrast, my parents' upbringings were quite the opposite. Both of them were born and brought up in a small village in India called Panidem, where the primary industry was agriculture. My dad and his three sisters lived in a mud-based hut with one room that was destroyed twice by cyclones, forcing them to rebuild it. They would wake up extra early to go work in the fields, and then attend school in the small schoolhouse next to their house right after. There were times when my dad's family went to bed hungry because there wasn't enough food to feed them all. My mom's experiences were similar to these, as most people in the village lived the same lifestyle.

Fortunately for me, I never had to go through any of this. However, that has always made me feel like I have a slight disconnect with my parents. Don't get me wrong, I am extremely close with my parents, but there's just something about the fact that my upbringing is so different from theirs.
"I guess it's just some kind of guilt about having had an easier life than they [my parents] did." - Art Spiegelman, Maus
My parents went through struggles in order to receive an education, such as selling their property just to attend college. Meanwhile, they tell me constantly that I should not worry about money when choosing a college because they'll somehow make it work. When I throw away some of the food that I put on my plate at the Indian buffet and didn't finish, my mom gets mad at me, asking why I bothered to take so much food if I knew I couldn't finish it. I get angered by this statement and proceed to wonder why my mom can't just understand that I was full. It's this presence of guilt or lack thereof that constantly forces a divide between my parents and I.

Maybe I should stop focusing so much on the separation and look more at what brings us together. Yes, I will never be able to fully comprehend my parent's childhoods. Despite this, I can still attempt to understand what they went through by listening to stories and visiting India as often as possible. Moreover, I can choose to actively empathize with them and understand where they're coming from when they tell me not to take certain things for granted. Rather than paint the divide between us to be a barrier, I should view it as a bridge that can only connect us and make us closer.

My Parents and Me!

Comments

  1. Jason LoucksOctober 7, 2018 at 6:34 PM

    Very nice post! I am sure that a lot of people can relate, including me. With the advancement of technology, world connectivity, the economy, many people's lives have gotten a lot better. I think it is good to point out that even though there are things that may divide us from our parents and other adults, that doesn't necessarily mean harder or easier (although that may be the case sometimes), but other times just different.

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